Setelah tulisan saya “Terjebak Kesepian” dipublikasikan, tanpa saya duga ternyata ada banyak sekali respon yang masuk, baik di blog, ataupun media sosial milik saya. It was quite overwhelming.. Dan untuk tidak membuat orang salah kaprah, saya membuat penjelasan tambahan di Twitter, yang semestinya saya tambahkan juga di tulisan saya itu. Karena jeda waktu sudah terlalu lama, akhirnya saya buat tulisan terpisah saja di sini.
Versi rangkaian cuitan saya di Twitter bisa dibaca dalam link berikut ini (silakan klik linknya):
Saya juga copy paste di bawah ini dengan sedikit tambahan penjelasan dan edit agar enak dibaca:
Not sure where to start.. thank you guys for reading my blog. Setelah dibaca lagi kok ketemu aja yg kurang rapi. Maafkan ya 🙏🏻
I started writing the draft about a month ago and just finished it last night. Edited a bit today before publishing. And… I started it (my writing) because similar thing happened at that time, I found posts about from group of friends without me. But last month I reacted pretty cool. So that’s an improvement, right? Yay me ^^
But to be honest writing the whole journey was not easy, it got me cried several times while putting it all into words. At least I didn’t get into that sad-panic attack state again.
Trus apa ya, why I write about it.. I have mixed reasons. I wanted to let it out. I do want so, but at the same time I don’t want people to know. Another part of my mind ask myself “aren’t you playing victim and seeking attention” Ngapain sih nulis ginian Nat.
Tapi apa ya.. Ya menurutku, perlu supaya orang tahu, kasus seperti itu (atau lebih parah) memang butuh ditolong. And by the way, yang kayak gini ternyata bukan aku doang. I may seem weird but not the only one… Aren’t we all weird anyway, hehe.
Gini, the dots started to connect when I have gone through it. I met other people who have their own sufferings. Levelnya lain2. But I can somehow relate as I had this experience myself (yang ditulis di tulisan sebelum ini). My experience enables me to empathize with others.
Lalu kayaknya memang tiba-tiba other pieces start to fall to the right place. Terpapar soal mental awareness day/month etc. The most recent one, ya ini, kemarin banget:
Oh ya (ini oot) interestingly belum lama ini aku baru nonton Into The Woods di TV cable. Ada lagu “No one is alone” … sempet ngerasa aneh dengernya.. Feel weird to hear the song because.. I know how to feel that very lonely feeling, and it left a scar.
Well. I hope what I wrote can bring some learnings… and raise the awareness (if you may) :)
Sebagai penutup dan memperjelas.. sekarang ini syukurnya saya tidak lagi dalam kondisi terpuruk seperti dulu itu. Semoga saja tidak terulang, tetapi jika terjadi lagi pun, semoga saya dan lingkungan saya lebih siap.